Monday, May 3, 2010

Everyone needs a little time away

My apologizes to Brian Reid for such a lapse in blogging. Mr. Stay at Home Dad blogger gave me the good advice to blog on a reoccurring basis so followers could get used to reading at a certain time. Well...that hasn't happened! It is now over a month since I have blogged and I can't believe how fast time has flown by. Time to get back into it.

Last month I got a weekend away from my family. It is a yearly event that I refer to as "The Boys Weekend." Once a year a group of us get together up in East Lansing, MI. for a fantasy baseball draft and also a little of reliving our past college days. It is something that each of us look forward to for various reasons. For me it is all about camaraderie with other guys. It is knowing for one weekend, I can let loose and just be. I don't have to worry about soccer games or dance competitions. I don't have to think if I have everything I need in the car for piano lessons or the band concert. This weekend, I just have to think about what I need. It is a good feeling...for a short time.

In years past, I have regretted how I have acted during this weekend as I was stupid and drank too much. That doesn't even touch on how I left things at home. In recent years though, I have learned from my mistakes and I now stay in control. I make up for my controlled drinking with a total lapse in calorie counting. I eat enough calories during this one weekend to probably not eat at all the entire next week. This allows me to have the same amount of fun without any of the regrets on Sunday, except for the fact that my jeans are a little tighter. I know that when I come home from my weekend that I have to be ready to reconnect with the family. There is no checking out or being tired because I am hung over after being away for the weekend. That is a very acceptable tradeoff for my time away.

Ok, so we now know how much I look forward to this weekend, but I also know the sacrifices this weekend places on my wife and family. In past years, when I wasn't so mature, I would just take care of my needs for the weekend and leave everything else at home to my wife. One year, I even forgot to buy groceries for the family and thought she could do it while I was gone! I have learned over the years what a responsible stay at home dad should do when he leaves his family for the weekend. This leads to a much better weekend for all.

I am very thankful that my wife gives me this time! It rejuvenates me. It helps me stay connected with other men. I am passionate about fantasy baseball and it lets me continue to play a game I enjoy. It gives me some freedom that I otherwise freely give up for my family.
I think every spouse needs some time away to just be themselves. It, in the end, will be a benefit for the entire family. When I come home, I am more attentive to my wife, I am more even tempered with my kids and I feel better about myself. This weekend makes me realize all the gifts I have in my life and how lucky I am. my wife, Kori...Thank you for giving me this weekend every year. This weekend makes me a better dad and a better husband. This weekend illustrates to me how great my life is and how fortunate I am. This weekend is about so much more than "The Boys Weekend," it is about me, something just for me. I can't wait till you start taking your weekend too. Hopefully you will get to experience all that I do and why it is so important to me. Maybe I will change the name of my weekend to "the me weekend." That seems more appropriate. I love you Kori!


  1. If having time away from the family makes you a better dad and husband, then instead of staying home, you should go to work every day. If just being away for a weekend has benefits, then surely being away every day will be even more beneficial.